Longevity of life force is not a part of my generational story. We leave early and bloody. Guns turned to temples swimming in despair, bodies bloated and found after days alone and unlooked after, hearts and brains stuttered and seized by arteries no longer able to carry their burden. Longevity of life is not our … Continue reading Getting to There (Navel Gazing While Black)
“Seeing her cry still made me feel the same way it did earlier.” ― Faraaz Kazi "When white women cry, everything stops." I wasn't the first to say this, but the words crystallize what it means in amerika when white women, anywhere and anytime shed tears. From a single salty drop to a full-blown red-nosed … Continue reading The Callout–For White Women Who Cry: Stop That Shit and Here’s How You Can
In this third segment of the story, some thoughts on forgiveness: The questions of forgiveness continue to bang around for answers within me. Who deserves forgiveness? Who desires it? What purpose does forgiveness serve? And who benefits from it? The truth for me is this: My daughter needed me present (at least by video conference) … Continue reading Even Monsters Need Flowers, Part 3
Trauma is a story most often told and framed through the lens of the victim. It is a narrative of a specific kind of pain that shatters and dissolves a human being into shadows and hauntings that cannot be exorcised, only mitigated through the daily and conscious choice to be whole. The infinite expression … Continue reading Even Monsters Need Flowers Part 1
I hear it every day. "I don't know what to do to help." "I don't wan' t to say/do the wrong thing." "I'm afraid to mess up." Too often these words are nothing more than an excuse to do nothing. They are a dose of paralytic fear that serves no one, least of all … Continue reading What to Do If You “Don’t Know What to Do”
Something that I notice as I navigate online spaces that are dedicated to anti-racism work with white people is that in the ones that seem to have the largest followings and support there is a foundational sentiment of kindness and sometimes even an expression of loving acceptance for the white people in those spaces. … Continue reading I Am the Broom
I posit that the behaviors of nice and good are not the same and we need to stop conflating the two conditions. Whereas, a nice person may appear to display qualities we associate with goodness, i.e. kindness, pleasant personality, courteousness, politeness, thoughtful, etc., whether or not they are actually a good person lies in their ethics. Goodness, in this instance, is about a deeper conviction, a virtue (a loaded word, but it fits), a core value of justice over propriety, a willingness to speak truth to power even when it is inconvenient or of personal cost...
“Are you sure, sweetheart, that you want to be well? Just so’s you’re sure, sweetheart, and ready to be healed, cause wholeness is no trifling matter. A lot of weight when you’re well.” ~Toni Cade Bambara, The Salt Eaters As spiritual sojourner on a non-traditional path, many folks in the Black church (where I was … Continue reading How I Came to Radical Resistance of Spiritual White Women
White women have been one of the constant violences in my life, a life of many inventive and horrible forms of violence. Because the violence you (the collective and individual white woman) do is so soul killingly insidious, and pervasive I choose to take you head on here. Leave your guilt, your shame, your not all's, your what about me's and all Beckery outside of these pages. My goal with you is to provoke change that will incite you in your transformation into a white woman who actually embodies the qualities of an ally in the fight to dismantle your own internal racism...